whip_poor_will | ☏ [HADRIEL] ic inbox

Thank you.

[She could try and play obtuse and say "for what?" but... even Ravine knows better.]

I may very well say the same to you.

Nah, all I did was...

「He chuckles.」

I was an embarrassment.

「Going around naked and trolling people.」

So... Yehudit? It must've been a while, huh?

I cannot think of many children who weren't embarrassments.

[Yehudit included, though it is still strange to hear anyone speak about it.]

It has. About three-thousand three hundred and eighty-seven years, in fact. I tend not to think of it anymore. [For perhaps obvious reasons.]

I think you were... I don't know, 「cute」 nice.

I suppose it's not useful to think about it, after so long.

「He says, but he does think differently, maybe because he forgot for so long that a day doesn't pass in which he isn't reliving memories.」

[This is where Ravine could also consider her own self an embarrassment. She did faint in front of him, after all.

[Sigh. Her ideas of the monarchy were much different back then.]

Well, I certainly had my moments. Don't let that scrawny little face fool you. [Don't worry, Atem. Judging by her tone, she's actually joking.]

Indeed. I was a much different person back then.

I think... we both were.

「Maybe not as much as he thinks, however. His view of certain things of the world haven't changed, he might still be that naive guy that wants world peace like every Miss Universe contestant there is, he still believes in friendship and how there is goodness in most people. He also still loves games.」

If you had the chance, would you go back?

[It's good that some things don't change.]

I am not certain that I would. I was very young when the siege upon my city changed everything, separated me from my family.

Still, those first few years were not terrible.

「There is a strained pause from his part, how could he forget? Well, no, he didn't it... simply was something he tried not to think about. It had been part of a dream, maybe that's why it felt so distant. What can he say, sorry? It wasn't his fault. They had already stablished that, and even so, he wishes there was something he could do.」

Did you ever get to see them again?

「He guesses the answer might be, no. But maybe she did, being who she is.」

Not exactly, but it is what it is.

[After a few millennia, she's learned to accept that fact.]

「He wishes he could be like her a little more, but forgetting, getting over it is something he cannot do. Does she miss them? Does she remember them? He also wishes to ask, but it'd be useless talk, wouldn't it?」

I suppose I should stick to Ravine, right?

That would probably be best. Yehudit has been dead for a long time, and it would be confusing to go by two names.

[Wow, Ravine. Try not to sound too indifferent about it, why don't you.]

「It actually makes sense, that's why he asked. It's not like all of her was lost... right?」

She's still you.

「Isn't she?」

She is, sometimes. I forget from time to time that she was more than the woman driven mad in later years.

[Which may or may not have a lot to do with how weird the Ravine she is now can be. Perhaps a little residue of that madness remains.]

「That's new.」

What happened?

「All he remember is that it had been a bad day.」

Does it matter, Atem? The past is the past, and you have already been burdened enough.

「It matters to him, because understanding someone's past can help him understand them better, it helped him with himself and it helped him understand certain stupid CEO, of course, he will not exactly prod too much if she doesn't want him to, he doesn't want to bring up painful memories, that's not what he's here to do.

Which is why he doesn't seem to understand what she says, did he hear that right? Wasn't this about her and not him?」

What do you mean?

I simply would not want you to see me any different than you do now.

[She knows how fondly he thinks of her. And the variables leading to the truth of what she had also done as a reaper are too many.]

Why don't you let me be the judge of that? I don't think anything you've done would make me change how I see you anyway, I know who you are... or, what you represent. It must have not been easy. And for that, I respect you.

You... have also seen me at my lowest. In here, at least. Has any of that changed the way you see me?

「How ironic, this question is, now.」

This is different. It was not always the only thing that I represented. While it may have taken a couple thousand years to find myself again, by then it seemed too late to make a difference. I take no pride in that.

That's fair.

「Idly, he remembers that dream she shared with him, he remembers those marks on her arms, how she said she hadn't always been okay. It is hard not to connect it to his ex-roommate, and he can't help but wonder, how terrible had it been after all those years for both of them.

Lucky bastard had chosen to forget those thousand of years inside the puzzle, before he could lock the Dark together with his memories, surely if he chose to dwell on them, he'd understand a little better but, of course, he won't. They came back, when he remembered everything, but he kept pushing them to the depths of his mind where not even he dared to approach.

So, this is fine, he's not gonna prod, because there is no way in hell he's gonna be talking about his own stuff either.」

Just know that I wouldn't judge you.

[Though her sins have been committed both in death as they have been in life, it'a a subject she hopes never to dwell upon again. How many souls she had damned for the primordial entity that transformed her purpose?

[No, she's more than that now -- and less, especially here, still anchored by the laws of her limitations.]

You have my thanks.

[She pauses a moment. Then, melancholic:] It was nice to feel again, if even for a spell.

[If it's one thing she can appreciate about the experience, it's the chance of being alive again for a few days.]

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

「Even if he probably made it extra hard at some moment. He's sorry about that.」

You truly don't feel, like... something?

「He had yet to reach that level of spirituality, to call it in some way. He was close but he was still bound to the living, he was alive after all, despite of how things had developed for him. He doesn't know if it's gonna be the same for him or not. He silently hopes it's not.」

[Let's be real, they were both messes.]

I do not. I have... memories, and can feel the presence of another person. But the warmth of an embrace or the savor of food and drink are long gone.

In truth, the gods claim to be capable of making me more alive. I have a raincheck with Tranquility for a temporary holiday. I do not think it wise to remain that way for long, however.

[Because of reasons that ended up killing her in the first place.]

「Ohhhh, she meant the, physical thing... Right.

Right?

He can at least relate to that, a little.」

Hey, at least you don't suffer from the heat.

「With that choice of clothing, it's funny to imagine her with a real body.」

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guess who? voice. backdated around the 4th

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